I used to be a huge control freak. My friends will attest to this, at least those that knew me in college. I had a planner (yes, a paper planner), wherein I scheduled out every minute. I even wrote down my social time. All of this planning and control was motivated by the goal of being successful in college. I felt that if I studied the right amount of time, had the perfect amount of social time, down time, and exercise, then I would be make great grades and land the perfect job. Of course all of this control masked the fear that I would not do well enough. Who for, I hadn’t quite figured out yet. Not surprisingly, the quarter I ditched my planner I got my highest GPA!
Since then, I’ve learned to let things go, although I feel like letting go was more a requirement than a choice. My husband surely would have left long ago, my kids would be maniacs, and I would always be dead tired from trying to keep up the perfect household. So, I don’t sweat that I have unfolded laundry in my office. I don’t’ care that my desk is messy most of the time. I only freak out once a week that the island in our kitchen is piled with mail. I do like my bed made every day and the kitchen clean before I start cooking. But these acts are motivated more by aesthetics and hygiene. I do keep a calendar with everyone’s schedule. This is motivated by necessity, not the need to have everything perfect.
Writing this blog I was tempted to find out how much of a control freak I still am. I found this website: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/brainsnacks/201006/are-you-control-freak-take-quiz-and-find-out. I actually didn’t do too bad, with a score of 30 just on the high end of “you can live and let live”. I found a good article on working through control issues by Dr. Amy Johnson that can be found at http://tinybuddha.com/blog/let-go-of-control-how-to-learn-the-art-of-surrender/. She has three questions to ask yourself that may help: 1) What am I afraid will happen if I let go of control?; 2) Whose business are you in (yours or someone else’s)?; and 3) Would letting go feel like freedom?
I like the graphic below. It reminds me to put my effort into activities that are worth my time!
Happy Letting Go!
About the Author
Tricia Copeland grew up in Georgia and now lives in Colorado with her family and four legged and finned creatures. Her new adult Being Me series is now complete with Is This Me?, If I Could Fly, Think You Know Me, and Being Me. Her young adult books include Drops of Sunshine, Native One, and Kingdom of Embers. You can connect with Tricia and other readers on Goodreads https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/14055439.Tricia_Copeland, Facebook www.facebook.com/TriciaCopelandAuthor, Instagram https://www.instagram.com/authortriciacopeland/- Twitter www.twitter.com/tcbrzostowicz, LinkedIn, Pinterest www.pinterest.com/triciacopelanda/, and Google+ https://plus.google.com/u/0/collection/8wque.